October, 2009

My dear reader: Hello! How are you? I'm quite well, thank you for asking. Quite, quite, quite well. First things first: let me apologise. I know it's been a little under ten and a half months since I updated. And I know that some of you are upset about that, because some of you have been sending me emails to tell me how upset you are. I'm quite flattered, actually. Who would have thought that foul-mouthed articles I wrote while sitting on the john would inspire such passion?

If it makes you feel any better, and I hope it does because it's the only way I sleep at night after committing the unforgivable sin of not updating in so long, I have a very good excuse: I was finishing up my thesis. That’s right: I’m now the proud recipient of a gen-u-wine Ph.D. in Materials Engineering. It’s Dr. The Iron Skeptic now. But that sounds so formal! You can just call me Sir. I jest, I jest. I know you’re going to keep calling me a cock anyway. Perhaps we can compromise and make it Dr. Asshole or whatever?

I have, despite our previous president’s best efforts to obliterate the American economy, found gainful employment in the frigid north. Seriously. It’s October and I can see my breath outside. But that’s probably because it’s not so much water vapor as it is alcohol vapor, which, as we all remember from thermodynamics… never mind.

Anyway! My setup here is sweet as hell. Apparently, when you live in the boondocks, apartments are much cheaper than they are in the city of Philadelphia. And since I’m not a graduate student anymore, the 60 hour work weeks are over. And that means more articles, coming soon.

Thank you for your patience! Thank you for your patronage! Thank you for teaching me new curse words via email!

Sincerely,
(Dr.) Aaron Sakulich